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Army Gear

5 December 2008 5 Comments

At one point in my life I was going to join the Canadian Army. I went and signed some papers, got physical and mental tests complete, and passed the written exam. Then I just needed one more paper signed by my family physician but said bullocks to that and never ended up joining. They called a few times here and there but finally gave up after a year or so. I could’ve made some nice cash during the summer and the training would have been useful, but I went on vacation instead and enjoyed the shite out of my summer. What I liked most from the whole army thing, well besides the guns, was their gear. I’ve got an army jacket and the Timberland boots that almost go hand-in-hand. When I’m not out clubbing, picking-up girls, you’d probably notice me in the street with me Timbs on, fucking about, looking for some interesting shite to get into. That’s the thing with Timbs, they’re great for almost anything. You can run in them, definitely fight in them, and most importantly they’re water and any other climate-proof.

Actually it’s a funny story of how I came about getting my Timbs. I didn’t go to the store and purchase them. Instead I was at the park with one of my mates drinking 40 oz. (malt liquor), and I got a call on me celly from my girlfriend who was a few years older and a few dollars richer, if y’know what I mean. The richer part is relevant, because she called me over to come to Yorkville, the most expensive and fancy hang-out street for Torontonians. Anywho, I wasn’t really appropriately dressed for something like Yorkville and I didn’t feel like going home to change. I was wearing jean shorts, a EUFA cup track jacket, and a worn-out pair of Air Forces—it was summer. My mate had jeans and Timbs on, which is much better to wear to a lounge than shorts and sneakers. So the good friend that he was, he ended up letting me wear his jeans and the Timbs, and in return he didn’t even want my shorts or Air Forces. He ended up driving home in boxers and socks. He was a really built bloke so he wouldn’t even fit in my jean shorts in the first place.

So that was it. Now I had his Timbs and jeans on and I went downtown to Yorkville and had a pretty enjoyable time actually, even though I was probably the most underdressed guy there, which I really didn’t give a shite about. Now how come I still have those Timbs, you may ask? Well, I ended up giving my mate’s jeans back the next day because they were in my car, but the Timbs were at home, so I had to give them back the next time I’d see him. The thing is, I never ended up returning his Timbs because sometime after that he’d been arrested and still either jail or in the pen, as far as I know.

Timberlands and a camouflage jacket are overall quite useful in daily activities… I’m hoping I don’t need to go into detail why “camouflage” would be useful, but it’s something good to have for anyone that gets into shite occasionally. Plus if it gets dirty, everyone will just think it’s part of the entire look of the camouflage.

. . . . .Cheers!


  • JAke said:

    Timbs are the way to go for sure.

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  • gloria said:

    Robby is this actually all true? the jail and all?

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  • Robby G (author) said:

    @gloria, all of my stories are true and yeah my mate is still in jail waiting for trial, I just don’t wanna mention the crime here. I also don’t mention names in my stories because it wouldn’t be fair to them and also I don’t really want any bobbies coming around and questioning me if they somehow get across stories like this online, because I’m actually using my own name.

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  • Matthew said:

    I’m surprised that the army would give up that easily, espescially if you signed commitment papers.

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  • Robby G (author) said:

    @Matthew: I wasn’t too surprised because I was joining only the summer program and it wasn’t the serious part of the army where I train in order to be taken to war some day.

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