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How to Break-Up with Your Woman

27 April 2009 10 Comments

A fellow reader named Crazy Oldie made a good point in a comment he left on “How to Find a Fuck-Buddy” that really made me want to add a follow up post to breaking up with your girlfriend. I have previously written a post called “Break-Up with Benefits” but today I want to elaborate on that subject and show different scenarios and how to avoid the entire problematic process of a bad break-up. In his comment, Crazy Oldie said:

“I have had girls that I hooked up with on the side cry, throw shit at me, even stalk me because towards the end, some sort of fuse went off in their brain where there forgot what the initial arrangement was.”

And that really made me think, how would someone really deal with this situation… or essentially any situation where the man feels like he needs to break-up with his woman, no matter if he’s still into her or not, just knowing that breaking-up is unavoidable in his desparate situation.

Whoever says breaking-up is as important as the relationship itself wasn’t kidding. Breaking-up is always hard but it doesn’t always have to be difficult. Of course there are a few different situations that call for break-ups and we’ll go through each one in steps.

1. When both of you feel that you should break-up:
This one is straight forward and the easiest one to deal with. You can just feel that not only you, but she as well, feels a distance in your relationship. You don’t have the same physical nor emotional attractions as you’ve once had. You both seem to just be simply drifting apart. In this situation it just all depends on who speaks up first. You can sit her down one day and tell her that you just feel that this relationship isn’t going anywhere and it’d probably be best if you just remained friends. There’s nothing wrong with that. You’ve tried it out and it didn’t work out… no biggie.

2. When you still like her but she’s clearly using you as a back-up:
Now this one is more difficult to deal with because it’s your emotions and feelings that you have to reanalyze and most likely battle. You have to reflect and consider the outs and if it’s better to be used by this woman as some second choice while she goes out and has fun with others or if you’re better off without her. Usually in this situation the whole “If you can’t have her, you love her more” idea comes into play. But that’s not true love and it’s honestly a waste of time. She might look great and at times seem that she’s into you, but it’s all an act she puts on. These women we call teases. There’s nothing you really have to do here in order to break-up because clearly she has no real concern whether you see each other or don’t. So it’s best to just distance yourself from her by not calling her; not picking up her phone calls (use excuses if she thinks you’re avoiding her); avoid going to places where you think you might see her. This might have two outcomes: either she gets mad at you because you’ve turned into an asshole and she’ll stop talking back to you, or she’ll get more intrigued by you because you’re no longer running after her and you’ve seemed to move on, and she might reverse the role and chase after you for a change. Don’t be fooled, this is all an act and this woman is probably not right for you. But if you’re lucky then you might still get something out of it if you know what I mean.

3. When she thinks everything is going well:
Jesus Christ this one is the worst one. This is where it truly gets ugly at times, unless of course if you do it right. In this one you have really got to put your acting mask on because the main goal here is to make her feel like the bad guy while you the innocent sheep who feels betrayed or hurt in one way or another. What I usually do is I keep going out with her acting like everything is still fine and dandy, but I keep my eyes and mind peeled on every little thing she does. Try to pick up on things that usually made you mad when she used to do but then you didn’t bother getting mad over because it wasn’t that big of a deal. For example: I was at one point dealing with a little bit older, married woman. Don’t judge me on this one guys. She was drop-dead gorgeous, and no they didn’t have any children at the time. Well once it got too hectic and I was feeling that both she and I were getting a little bit too close, I knew I had to get out. She was already telling me she loves me and all that junk, and the fool that I was I let it go on for a little while, so I was deeper (emotionally) in than I had wanted to be. So since she was very high-class, aristocratic and considered herself an intellectual princess, I was pretty much like the rugged replication of Marv (Mickey Rourke) from Sin City: let’s just say I’m not on a pretty-boy status, which she was definitely not used to. So anywho, the point to this is that she often tried remarking on little things I had done incorrectly, such as didn’t hold her hand when she was getting into the car, or didn’t put the napkin on the left side of the table once I was done my meal, or if I didn’t stand every time she or any other woman would leave or come back to the dinner table. This usually bothered me a little, but it was also something that I knew I was benefiting from if I was ever around those rich kind of people. I had told her once before not to ever do it in front of other people, so once after I realized we were getting too close, we were eating at a sushi restaurant with other people and I did something which she considered inappropriate so she told me that I shouldn’t do it, but even though she told me in my language, which the other people didn’t understand I still didn’t like it and I decided to speak up about it. So first I told her that it’s rude to speak in other languages in front of others who don’t understand your language, and then I acted like it really bothered me even though I kept telling her that it was alright and there were no problems. So in conclusion I made her feel like the “bad guy” by trying to embarrass me in front of others (even though it really didn’t mean anything to me) and even though she apologized, I acted like it had left a big scar in the relationship and that it overall very much offended me and on the next date I would break-up with her. It would look like I had taken time to really think about it and that it was the last straw.

I cannot stress enough how important it is to make her seem like the bad guy in the break-up. I emphasize this just because this will not only have you look like the good guy who did everything right and because of her inconsiderate actions or inactions you were forced to break-up with her, but this also gives you a chance with her friends if they’re good looking.


  • Drake said:

    I can see why you wanted to add this post to your older post. It does elaborate and is more relevant to the topic. GOod post and great final story.

  • Sheran said:

    Terrible, mean, heartless, but I love it!

  • Robby G (author) said:

    @Sheran: It’s good that you love it, but hey it’s the women in my second example of this post that are heartless. Everyone is mean at times, but life goes on. 🙂

  • Crazy Oldie said:

    Thanks for the love buddy! Great post you wrote!

    I gotta say, as ugly as #3 is, I love these ones. The dumb trick is so clueless as to the shit that is wrong around her ass that she just brings on the dramatic tears to try to save the relationship. This is where the boys divide from the men. The men will cut the losses and move on, the idiot boys will fall into her lame trap filled with tears and be stuck with an even more clingy ass annoying trick…cut your losses! There is so much tail out there , its not even funny! Break up with your woman before she breaks up with you!

  • Robby G (author) said:

    @Crazy Oldie: Break up with your woman before she breaks up with you! I’m all for that mate. I get so pissed when I see men out there that work the other way and cling onto their girls like they’re some fucking Fabergé Egg. There are millions of girls out there, so men should never think they’re losing something special.

  • jimmy said:

    thats the way a man always should be.

  • Jessica White said:

    Do you think blogging just has to be about writing? Reason I ask is I want to start a photography blog, but I feel I am better at expressing myself with photos rather than write. Should I even start it? With your experience could it work, more pictures, less words?

  • Robby G (author) said:

    @Jessica White: There are many photoblogs out there and one of my favourites you may want to check out it: http://www.acognitivestateofmind.com/
    So yeah, there’s a possibility to make a big blog out of just photos rather than words. Just be passionate and keep updating. Good luck.

  • Morgan Palmer said:

    photoblogs are cool and i maintain at least two of them-;’

  • NLP Book&nbsp said:

    i maintain at least 3 photoblogs coz i love taking pictures and sharing it online;~~

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