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How to Tell if He Likes You

4 March 2010 5 Comments

Well, there is this guy, we met a little over a year ago through a mutual
friend, and we began a friends with benefits relationship. I started to like
him but he told me he had messed with another girl, so we stopped talking we
just started talking again and a few weeks ago, we began the friend w/
benefits relationship again. Well I have always liked him, but not sure how
he feels about me…. I mean like earlier it snowed and he rode a mopad just
to see me.. I really need to know if it sounds like it could be more or not,
and if so how could i approach being more? He always comes in and hugs me
and kisses me and kisses me before he leaves… just really confused!


When you say he drove through the snow just to see you do you actually “see” you or to have sex with you? Because that makes a big difference. I’m not exagerating–driving a moped through snow is a minor inconvenience when it comes to getting a fuck out of it. However, if it is actually just to see and be with you (without intentions of getting laid) then he does think of you as someone more than just a friend with benefits.

Also, the kisses and hugs could just be part of his method to keep you around so you don’t think he’s not into you anymore. I don’t want to sound bleak, but I personally have in the past told my fuck buddy that I’ve slept with another girl just so the current fuck buddy wouldn’t think that there is anything more between us than just the sex. However, when I’ve cheated on my girlfriend, I would try my hardest for her not to find out. Telling a fuck buddy you’ve slept with another girl could ease the relationship a bit because she understands that there is nothing serious between them.

What Should You Do To Make Sure

A sure way to make sure whether he likes you more than just a friend with benefits is to look for the following signs:

  • He calls you to set dates (dinner, a movie, etc) that don’t end up in the bedroom.
  • He avoids talking about other girls in fear of getting you jealous.
  • He likes to stick around after the sex and doesn’t seem anxious to leave.
  • He likes it when you hang out with him and his friends.
  • Gets quiet or jealous (or changes the subject) when you discuss other men with him.
  • He shows affection by calling to see if got home okay or how your evening out was.

    • Now, if he doesn’t do any or close to any of those then the chances are he only likes you as a friend with benefits and isn’t looking for a relationship. Over the next few days try to pick up on the listed criteria and you’ll know if he likes you more than a friend with benefits.

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    5 Comments »

    • Cindy said:

      It seems so logical but we girls just put so much thought into whether he likes or dislikes us and we look at it all out of context and blur the lines. I guess we always make excuses that will justify that he really does like us just didn’t have time to call or lost my number and stuff like that. It’s nice even though sad sometimes, to get back in check with these sort of posts.

      Reply to Comment

      # 10 March 2010 at 6:47 am
    • Confused Jane said:

      Hi Rob! It’s me, Confused Jane, the one who was talking to you about “Paul”, the good friend of 2yrs who turned in to a FWB/FuBu in just one night.

      [CHECK!] He calls you to set dates (dinner, a movie, etc) that don’t end up in the bedroom.
      [CHECK!] He avoids talking about other girls in fear of getting you jealous. (But I did ask him what happened to this other chick he used to be seeing, and that was the only time he talked of another girl. He’d only ever talk about ex’s or other girls if I asked him about it)
      [CHECK!] He likes to stick around after the sex and doesn’t seem anxious to leave. (Well, he wants ME to stick around some more)
      [CHECK?] He likes it when you hang out with him and his friends. (We have the same group of friends)
      [omg CHECK!] Gets quiet or jealous (or changes the subject) when you discuss other men with him.

      Thank you for this. I just realized it now… as I was talking about my ex to him, instead of giving me advice about it, he would just quietly agree, nod his head, or change the subject!
      And whenever I saw a guy I thought was cute & would nudge him & tell him & sortof expect him to egg me on or cheer me for it even, instead he changed the subject, like
      “So what are you really looking for right now? What kind of relationship are you seeking?”
      and “What do you like in a guy?”

      Do these things mean that “Paul” is really in to me..? And doesn’t just want to get in to my pants..?

      Reply to Comment

      Robby G Reply:
      May 1st, 2010 at 9:01 am

      @Confused Jane: Stop thinking about it right now, because Yes, he is into you! lol I could tell from your previous question that you over thinkg things and need to realize men aren’t too complicated. And if checked to all of those criteria then he definitely has feelings for you. The fact that he directly “joked” that you should rebound from your ex and he would take your spot should have been enough for you to realize there is something there. I put more info in my other comment, so check it out, but anywho, I hope you well because you already have this guy who knows so much about you and now you have incorporated sex into it, so if he is still into you after so many years then go for it and try out a relationship.

      Reply to Comment

      # 29 April 2010 at 5:59 pm
    • Kate said:

      Help!!!! Ok here goes, I have been gettin to no this guy for 6 months now. He is in the army so I get to see him a few times a month depending when he is back home. Since the day we met we ain’t stopped textin, more than oftern he texts first, and always ending with gud night sweet dreams. When we meet up it’s not just for sex. When we do have sex, the sex has now changed he is even more considersate, intermate, kissing my lower back and legs, strokin my hair. After we lie there him holding me, have random convo, making each other laff, telling me stories of work. We then get dressed to go down stairs for a smoke we are there talking he holdin me constanly kissing me tucking his hands into to top of my jeans, when we stop kissin he still holds me. He kissed me on the forehead and still even more slow soft kissed when he leaves. Then after he has gone 15 20 mins later he texts!
      While he as in afghan he was messaging me when he cud, which I wasn’t expecting, them soon as he got home the constant texts started again. He met me for a drink the morning after he was back. I wanted to go for a “ride” in the car but he surprised me with the answer, I want our first time since me being back to be good not a fumble in the back seat, do u mind if we wait!! He tells me he likes me, sends me photo which he takes for me and that no one else has seen, he says I’m addicive, when he thinks he has said something wrong to me and I don’t text back he calls and gets worried!! He goes back away for 6 months but already has plans to stay in contact when away and see me when he gets back. Is this someone who has feelings for me?

      Reply to Comment

      # 12 May 2010 at 4:50 pm
    • Alice said:

      Hi, okay so hopefully you can help me out with this.. I can sort of relate with the past stories I’ve read here, but here’s the thing with me.. my ex-boyfriend is my fuck buddy. We only went out for like a month, but ever since we broke up we’ve still been seeing eachother and we broke up like 4 years ago now…but it took us two years to start having sex. So it’s been two years that we’ve been fuck buddies.. and I’m confused to the max! because when we’re together, it’s like we’re still boyfriend girlfriend but without the title. And there has been situations when he does get jealous if he finds out other guys want to start seeing me or have a thing for me… he never says anything… he just stays quiet and doesn’t really say much. And when we do have sex, it’s not just like we have sex and he leaves. Sometimes he does, but most of the times he stays and cuddles with me and it’s only been one time that he did sleep over, but that time I was home alone ( I live with my sister ) but I know that if I lived alone he’d spend the night more often. So yes he’s sweet to me and everything, but this is what throws me off: He only sees me to have sex.

      Before, we did use to hang out like actually hang out at his house and watch movies together… or go to the park or movies..and this was after we broke up. But now, it’s been a while that he doesn’t take me out like that.. and only sees me for sex, and I actually straight up told him one night how I felt about him just calling me up for sex… how I felt used by him, and the look on his face I could tell he felt bad, and he told me that he didn’t want me to feel that way and that he wanted to start seeing me more often..

      And I told him that I didn’t want him to tell me that only because I had made him feel guilty or anything like that, and he said no, that he really does want to, not just because I said it, but that because he wanted to.

      So a month past and I didn’t see him. He did call me through out the month but he said he was really busy and he couldn’t see me…. and I know i’m going to sound naive… but I actually do believe him cause he goes to a university and is working currently two jobs and on the side he makes mini movies and music videos for local upcoming artists… And also a while ago when he met my sister, he told her that he knows how I feel like maybe I don’t belive him about him being busy, but that he really does care about me and this and that. I do notice how he changed after I told him how I felt about being used… But I do belive actions speak louder than words. He only tells me he wants to see me… and that makes me believe that he cares… but he is STILL only seeing me for sex…..

      He does call me and text me at times to see how I’m doing… but then again when we see each other it’s just booty calls. And well yesterday he actually told my best friend that she, him and I should hang out soon…. which is really weird because he never really hangs out with me and my friends together. It’s always just me and him… so idk if to take this as a good thing or a bad thing?? Because in a way yeah, it makes me smile that he actually told my best friend that the three of us should hang out… but then again, I feel like maybe this is his way of letting me know we’re just friends?? because just the fact that I haven’t seen him in a month, I feel like he should want to hang out just me and him….not hang out with my friends and I…. It’s just the fact that he hardly ever does that, it makes me scared a little cus I don’t know what that means. Maybe I over think things too much… But since I haven’t seen him since about a month now… I feel it’s just a little weird and out of the blue that he all of a sudden wants to include my friends. Help haha.

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      # 26 August 2010 at 8:47 pm

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