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Is He Genuinely Interested in a Relationship?

21 August 2010 No Comment

I met this guy on a dating site. We were texting and talking almost everyday,
within a few days he started saying that we should be together as in we
should be a couple, i thought it was BS of course. So finally after several
failed attempts we met late night so we couldn’t go anywhere. we talked for
a couple of hours and then all of a sudden he kissed me which I responded
to. The next few days were slightly different because he wasn’t texting nor
calling as much (which he never did to be honest) but I thought it would
become more frequent but well we met a second time (late night, AGAIN!!!)
same thing, that day he asked me again if I wanted to be with him, Now here
is the thing; if he knows or has a hint that I’m still going to have sex
with him, why would he keep asking me if I wanted to be with him? Anyway I
said yes and well the third time we did have sex, which was amazingly good,
he kept telling me how amazing I was and all sorts of stuff, he seemed very
pleased, he was really sweet with me afterwards and all but what bothers me
about him is that he doesn’t call nor text frequently, I mean is this normal?
or am i just spoiled if I’m expecting calls everyday (I’m sorry but I’m used
to that) another thing is that he is always working (so he says) so he’s
never available until late night, I’ve only called him a few times, but he
hardly ever answers. At this point I don’t know if I’m his FB or am I the
real thing? It most certaintlly doesn’t feel that way. We’ve never been on
an actual date, we’ve never gone anywhere because of his stupid schedule.
Now when we’ve talked about wanting to see each other for sex he doesn’t
necessarily show up. He keeps giving me these mixed messages. I’ve kinda
confronted him about us, like what’s going on and he just tells me that he’s
really busy but he does like to be with me and wants to be with me and he’s
going to make time for me. What should I do? Act and treat him as if he is
my FB (because that’s what it really feels like), should I talk to him again
or just cut him off???

If it’s only been a few weeks then give him some more time. Try to get to know him better before cutting things off. You cannot know what exactly is going on in his mind at this time, so just try to be there for him when he does call. Also, try to be more assertive by calling him yourself and text him with messages that will require a response, such as questions. When you meet or talk to him again, make sure to tell him that you would want to receive more calls from him. Sometimes when guys get into relationships, they are afraid of pushing the girl away by being too involved, because they fear that they will seem too needy and/or protective and that will drive the girl away. Make sure to let him know that you like it when he calls and though you understand that he is busy and has work lots of the time, it would still be nice to receive a call or text just to show that he cares and is thinking about you.

He’s not exactly treating you like a fuck buddy yet and if he keeps telling you that he likes you and wants to be with you then I doubt those are his intentions. If he wanted to be your fuck buddy then he would not have been the first to begin talking about relationships and being with you. I also think that before you make any serious decisions you should go on a few more dates, whenever you both have time to get together, and try to find out more about him. If you are thinking about something serious and a formal relationship then you should know if he has treated all his past relationships this way or what were the reasons behind why he broke up with his past girlfriends. If he has treated most of his past girls this way then he obviously is following a cycle where he gets excited over a girl, wanting a relationship, start sleeping with them before getting to know them well enough to know if he is genuinely attracted to her enough to want something serious. Just don’t give up yet and try to find things about him that you didn’t know, then maybe it’ll be easire to make a decision.

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