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My Fuck-Buddy and His Girlfriend

14 May 2010 5 Comments

Dear Robby,

I came across your blog cuz I’ve been googling ‘advice’.

Theres this guy I really like, I met him over a year ago & we kicked it off
instantly. But just as things were starting to get serious, he confessed
that he has a girlfriend already so I backed off cuz I didn’t wanna be with a guy
who’d cheat on his girlfriend.

Although I’ve to admit, I never really got over him even if I was seeing
other guys. I’d run into him occasionally cuz he lives near me & we both
hang out in the same places.

Recently I bumped into him again. To cut the story short, we hooked up even
if I’m well aware he’s still with his gf.

We only did it once, but we’d still call & text everyday. I think I’m getting
too attached cuz Im starting to miss him & I think I want something more.

I guess the question is, do guys fall for their fuck buddy? is there any
chance this’ll lead to something more? How do I make him fall?

Looking forward to hearing from you.


Though guys do sometimes fall for their fuck buddies, in most situations what happens when they have a girlfriend and a fuck buddy on the side is something different. Usually, a man keeps sleeping with their fuck buddy and they stay with their girlfriend and do not desire changes because it seems to be a very comfortable position. Mostly they begin to enjoy the string-free sex so much that they do not feel like they need to complicate things and just continue to enjoy the way things are. So though there are chances that things can lead up to something more, there are certain requirements that must be undertaken on your part.

Basic Information

Before you can make him fall for you, you have to find out a few things about his current relationship with his girlfriend. The next time you get together with him, try to take it slow and do not jump straight into bed but ask him how his relationship is going. Do not fear talking about things that really matter because it is the lack of communication that makes people question everything the next day, wishing they new what his motives were. The fact is, the best way to find out what his thoughts on the matter are is by simply talking to him about them. When you go to bed with questions that you wished you had the answers to, sometimes they aren’t as diffuclt to receive then by just asking him the things you want to know. If he does not want to talk about his girlfriend with you, ask him what he thinks what you two are currently sharing is. Do not pick a fight with him, but ask him to communicate more with you. Explain to him that you are not currently happy with the fact that he is only using you for sex and you believe that it is unfair to both you and his girlfriend that there is this deception. Do not threaten him, but just ask him to choose between you and her. You also are wondering how you can make him fall for you so you can drive him away from his girlfriend, but you have to ask yourself somethings first: Do you really want a boyfriend that hooked up with you by cheating on his own girlfriend? Do you think a healthy relationship can form on the basis of cheating. In my opinion, the only relationships that can last which were formed on unfaithfulness are if the other person was already in the process of breaking up and once he finds someone new he does not wait to break-up with his girlfriend and does it without requiring any extra push to do so. Nonetheless, if you are okay with this then there are a few ways you can get him to fall for you.

Un-needy, Strong, Likable

There are elements to a way a woman is that men like. You will have to act like he isn’t your main man to go to for any sort of affection or even sex. If you are uncertain if my advice of simple communication will work on him, then you may try a different method of attraction. Though some people believe that in a fuck-buddy relationship a man is usually the one using the woman for sex, there is something about a woman acting indifferent to this usery. So instead of seeming hurt, acting completely emotionless to the fuck-buddy relationship allows a woman to flip the tables and make the man feel like she is using him for the sex. Men are very sensitive to the idea of being used for sexual exploits. Though most men will not admit that they care if they are being used for sex, the truth is that they begin to question themselves and fear that they may not be adequate for a woman to like them for more than just sex. Though this fuck-buddy of yours has a girlfriend who shows him that she cares for him, if you on the other hand do not exert the same affection then he may want to pursue your approval of him on a level higher than just sexual. Instead of texting him back all of the time, miss a few of his calls and texts and show him that you do not have time for him unless you are interested in only hooking up with him. If he says he wants to meet you and you know it will lead to sex, then refuse a few times, and only call him back when you are the one who is interested in sex. Basically, make him feel like you are in charge of the fuck-buddy relationship and this may stir feelings of mystery in him that will make him want to pursue you so you become more interested in him for more than just sex. And only if this method does not work out then open up to him and tell him that you are interested in something beyond an occasional hook-up, but still do it with some sort of poise and without seeming like he is your only option.

5 Comments »

  • Trish said:

    Robbie I met this guy online on Myspace he took me out twice when we both met but on both dates i had my kids . Oh by the way he is 26 and i am 40 yrs old . We have been fuck buddies for 6months now, but recently one day he called said he was coming up and then called right back and said he could not make it , I have not heard from him since then. I have text him a sexual mess no response, even called and the line had a bunch of static he said hello, i kept saying hello then the call dropped. The last time we had sex it was wonderful only one thing he had put all these hickeys on my face and body, i thought that was odd since he told me he was involved with someone. Should i call him again i have not tried to call him in two weeks, I figure i would let it go and move on . Do you think he was starting to catch feelings which i doubt since he is alot younger than me. I really want to call him because i love the sex , but i am not sure if he wants to be bothered, oh i forget i had stated asking him for money do you think this is why but he did say a close mouth will not get fed, meaning if i don’t ask him for money he does not know i need it. I know i have alot of stuff going on but i tried to keep the story short and to the point .

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  • nathan said:

    hey look mami im a 20 yr old man in the makin and i was in youre same delima about 6 months ago so imma tell you this not just through expirience but also with pure intent love is a metaphore man cannot decifier and the reason is it usualy stands before us. but it was a women for me if you realy wanba try to see if it ment to try seeing someone else of equal variety ok uhh heres my face book if you want j-o-h-n h-a-r-p-e-r it the pic with the heat map in the center

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  • gnorimies said:

    Great article. We learn from you pal, keep going

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  • Ped said:

    i’m gay and i have a male fuckbuddy.. but he has a girlfriend.. do u think he loves me or not?

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  • bri said:

    I been on and off with this guy I meet on Facebook for like almost 6 years we then started out as a couple but it only lasted 2 weeks we decided to jus be friends but recently we saw each other and had sex.. You see im a virgin well at least i was.. It was a lil awkward at first but it gotten better. We had sex 2 times.. I’m just wondering do this guy cares that he took my virginty? With us just being fuck buddies indicates he doesn’t care?

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