Step Up Your Game »

[11 Apr 2010 | 6 Comments | ]

Hi Robby,
I have a couple questions for you. Do guys test girls to see if they are
cool and not stalker-like?

I met this guy outside a bar. We hit it off right away. I liked him but
knew to stay away because I got a player vibe from him. He was just too
cute and too smooth for me, his moves and lines seemed to be perfected from
lots of practice…. Plus he just moved here that week and I’m sure he has
plans of partying it up here for the summer. So I avoided him the rest of
the night. I had no intention of giving him my number but he was all about
me and wouldn’t leave the bar without it. He called me a couple days later.
I didn’t respond because I honestly knew his type and didn’t want any of
that in my life. Plus I just got out of an 8 yr relationship and wasn’t
ready to date. He pursued me for three weeks with flirty, persuading calls
and texts. I finally caved in and went out on a date. We had the best time
ever! It seemed as though we clicked in every way. Again though, he was just
too smooth and knew he probably went on a million dates all the time and was
able to lure me into his world with his playa power. I just went with it and
figured I’d play him back. We slept together that night, amazing sex!
I was sure I’d never hear from him again, but he texted me two days
later. He made sure to book me for a date the next weekend. We went out on a
second date. It was also so much fun. We talked about everything and found
out we had so much in common. He didnt seem as much of a player as I
thought. It seemed as though he was even taken back by our connection. He
said such sweet things that seemed so sincere. He even asked me to hang out
with him in 3 weeks because he wanted me to meet his buddies that were

We of course had more hot sex that night. But it was more than just that or
at least I thought it was. I woke up the next morning to him cooking me
breakfast. How sweet and un-player like? or is it? Anyway, he walked me to
the train and told me he’d call me later. It’s been 12 days since and have
not heard from him. How weird? I honestly don’t want a boyfriend or anything
but am shocked because I read people really well and it seemed as though he
was totally smitten by me.

Could it be that I our connection overwhelmed him? Or that he thought I was
girlfriend material and just didnt have the heart to tell me he didnt want a
girlfriend right now? Or is he testing me to see how I’d react to him not
calling? Or is it straight up that he’s just not that into me?

I don’t get the game. I kind of want to put him in his place. I can take
being rejected. I’d rather him be straight up with me than just sleep with
me and toss me away like an old newspaper.

I was going to text him in a few days if I dont hear from him and just say
“Hey, whats up? ” . Or should I just not contact him again?

What do you think? Is he playa or what?

Thanks for any advice,

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General Advice »

[10 Apr 2010 | No Comment | ]

I have been enjoying being single lately, but the other weekend all of that
changed…. I met this boy at a party and we just hit it off he walked me
home like a gentleman and came inside to have a drink. He ended up staying
the night and it was extremely pleasant and PG. It seems to be going well,
but I can’t seem to get the negativity out of my head. What steps should I
take to avoid looking clingy, or too interested. Should I just get over it?

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Relationship Tips »

[8 Apr 2010 | No Comment | ]

Hi Robby,

Hello! I just want to ask about my present situation with my fuck buddy. I could call him my fuck buddy, because I met him over a year ago and since then we never stopped communicating to each other until now. Our first meeting was cancelled then I changed it to another day, but all he wanted was sex only, no emotion involved between us. He was a really nice guy, treated me nicely, and taught me everything about sex, because before i met him I was not very experienced in it. I cannot even count how many times we met already. We usually meet up before or after my work, because his place and my working place are quite near. I do enjoy his company and after sex we do talk, cuddle, and hug like we are in real relationship. Usually after our session I leave his place after 30 minutes or so, but lately I don’t like leaving that early anymore.
I use his house things, never shy around him anymore. For example, before we never took a bath together, but now he is the one who want us to take baths together. I just feel that something is different between us now than before and we do care about each other now. When we meet up, I always bring him something, he is very thankful for that, and before he used to tell me about the women he met, but now he never brings up that topic anymore. I don’t know if he is still
meeting other girls. I miss him whenever I don’t see him, is this a sign
that we are falling for each other now, because I really just don’t want to be in a real relationship. Before im usually the one who says “see you soon”, but now no more. He is the one who tell me that …. this thing always mixed up my mind, i really don’t know what are we now? can you help me figure out my problem. Before I leave his pad, he always hugs me very very tight, kisses me all over, which makes me happy, but I’m really not sure what we are ….. please help me, thanks.

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General Advice »

[5 Apr 2010 | 4 Comments | ]

Money! - Band & Lyrics Week Day 3
This is a guest post by John Anyasor from HiLife2B

When I was young, I cultivated a dream to become a CEO. A leader. A guy who everyone looks up to and always gets things done. A clean-cut, suit-wearing, cigar-smoking, money-burning, nice car-having entrepreneur that had a mansion, a hot wife, and 3 and a half kids. And while most of what I wanted has changed over the last decade or so (I still want the attractive wife), I see now that success in not measured in material acquisitions. Success is being able to afford time for yourself and for others. Do you get that? In other words, success means being able to own your time and do what you’re passionate about.

Now maybe you like getting up to work from 9 to 5 every weekday morning (and that’s okay). If you’re working in a field that you’re passionate about then, by all means, keep at it. But if you don’t necessarily want to work for 8 hours straight with a lunch thrown in for good measure, you’re going to have to change the way you think about careers.
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General Advice »

[4 Apr 2010 | No Comment | ]

Thompson wisdom
The power of the fucking internet. Jesus, I had just finished writing a blog post– Sorry, that’s a lie. I had just finished writing a single paragraph for my upcoming ebook, when I decided I needed a break. Now, since I don’t own a television set, I went on the net to find something comical to watch. A moment later, I was watching Curb Your Enthusiasm on MegaVideo. For those who do not know MegaVideo, well it’s a site where you watch shows, but unless you purchase the upgrade, you can only watch a certain lengths of the show. Since I had watched something previously that day on MegaVideo, I could only watch five minutes of Curb, and then had to wait 72 minutes before I could continue watching.
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Relationship Tips »

[3 Apr 2010 | 6 Comments | ]

Hi Bobby, firstly can I say I really enjoy reading your site. Your advice is
honest and well written, so I hope you can shed some light on my situation.

I met a guy in early January through an online dating site and after
speaking for a while we went on a date. As the date ended, we both wanted
to spend more time together, but as all the bars were closing, we decided to
go to his flat to watch a movie. We ended up making out and he asked me to
stay the night, which I did. I did not sleep with him, although he did ask.
We texted a little following the first night, and arranged to meet at his
flat the following week before I went on holiday for two weeks. Again, I
stayed round but did not sleep with him.

When I was at holiday we texted and kept in contact, and when I returned I
tried to arrange for us to go on a date. He replied saying he was very sorry
but busy at work (he is a paramedic that works long hours and throughout the
weekends). I was disappointed and later that day asked him whether he
wanted to keep in contact and meet up when he was free, and he said that he
had started seeing someone else and it would therefore be inappropriate to
keep seeing me. He said he was sorry if I felt he had led me on but that he
wanted to remain friends.

I was disappointed, but wasn’t emotionally invested enough not to want to
be his friend. We kept in contact, and one night we were texting and he said
it hadn’t worked out with the other girl he was seeing. He asked if I wanted
to drop by his flat as it would be easier than texting. I went over and we
ended up sleeping together.

We saw each other every week/every other week for the next 6 weeks or so.
Each time he would come to mine or I would go to his, we’d cook dinner,
watch a movie and he’d stay round. Typical FB behaviour right? In between
our nights together we were also speaking to each other every day via
Instant Messenger or text.

As we are both online daters, we are both dating other people. We are
however not sleeping with other people. He has told me he is looking for a
serious relationship.

Last week, I was having some drinks with work friends & my best friend and
he said he would like to come along. He got on very well with my best friend
and made an effort to speak to my colleagues. He stayed til the very end,
even if he later admited he was a bit bored.

As the time has passed, I have begun to realise that in an attempt to not
get emotionally involved with him, I have been supressing my feelings and
hence what I really want. I spoke to him today and he said he had a date on
Monday, and it actually made my heart hurt a little. This is when I knew
that perhaps this arrangement is no longer suitable for me.

I want him to know how I feel, and also try understand what he wants from
me. But at the same time I don’t want to scare him with an ultimatum, as I
don’t think that would go down well!

I told him I would like to see him on Monday for a chat – so I am really
hoping you can give me some (urgent!) advice on how to approach the subject
with him.

Thank you for your time

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General Advice »

[1 Apr 2010 | 2 Comments | ]

In a past post entitled “What I Look for in a Girlfriend” I discussed the 10 criteria that makes a great girlfriend, but now I want to share with you things in women that I personally find as complete turn-offs. I’m not going to discuss looks here, but mostly the turn-offs that can be fixed by the woman (for the most part) and ones they can change into positive aspects about themselves. So for all those women who wanted to know what it is that the man most likely does not like about you, it is most likely one (or more than one) of the following things I will discuss. Of course, this is very subjective and some men may not focus on these specific turn-offs as much as me, but I’d say for the most part men share these views, so women, be safe and try to avoid these next points.
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