Retreat and He will Follow
I have been seeing this guy as fuck buddy for about a year now. And i liked
him ever since, like i’ve cried over him. But i just can’t say it to him, because
i think he only sees me as just a fuck buddy. And now, he has a girlfriend,
though he didn’t confirm it, but i saw pictures of them on facebook. So
anyway, I want to let him feel that i have feelings for him, by not making a
fool out of myself. Should I do it? how?
The best way to let him know that you have feelings for him is face to face and in person. I know however that if the feelings are not returned on his part then telling him you like him more than a fuck buddy will not do you any good except give him an excuse to become a little distant. I would personally advise against telling him that you like him and instead try to suppress those emotions for a while until you see how things go between him and this unofficial girlfriend of his. Decrease the amount of time you spend with him and decrease the amount of communication. Maybe text him 10 days or 2 weeks after not having to talk to him and ask how everything is going and feel free to ask him about any relationships he may have. Ask him “how are girls treating you? Get into a relationship while I’ve been keeping busy?” and things of that nature. In situations such as yours where you fear that he does not have the same feelings for you as you do for him, it is sometimes best to act even more indifferent to any “formal relationship” than the man because it intrigues him to the mysteries of why you are not getting emotionally attached. It is once the man sees that he has broken you down and you are emotionally dependant on him that he may feel uncomfortable to be around someone who likes them when they in fact only view them as a fuck buddy.
Cold, Distant, Mysterious
Over the past few months I was involved with a couple of fuck buddies and I viewed both just as what they were: fuck buddies. One, however, ended up liking me more than I wanted her to and she began treating our relationship as something more than what it was. I was not interested in anything serious so I began to avoid her more and telling her that I wasn’t available to go out with her whenever she wanted to date. The other fuck buddy, however, knew exactly what we were and acted accordingly. The funny thing was that though the second fuck buddy did not seem to show any emotional attachment to me, I was able to feel more free with her and did not mind going out to public places with her. We did not call it dating, but just hanging out. She would sometimes tell me she was busy and I was very cool with her distance at times and I even found her coldness towards me mysterious and appealing. We eventually went our separate ways, mutually agreeing to move on, but out of the two fuck buddies, it was the one who acted cold and distant at times and only contacting me when she wasn’t busy to hang out and then have sex, but I found that I would easily be able to date someone like her if I was to allow myself to grow more attached to her overtime than the previous fuck buddy who lay the cards out on the table and revealed to me that she liked me more than a fuck budy.
Though our hearts tell us certain things and we choose to believe that our love will be returned, we still must use our rational mind to play the game correctly and get out of it what we want even though it may take more time and patience and deception. Keep that in mind and don’t underestimate the power of a woman when she excells in acting and saying the right thing at the right time while making it seem effortless.