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Secrets to Hooking Up at a Pub

20 September 2009 8 Comments

I heart my job!
I’m not so much a club-goer, I’m more of a pub-goer. Are there any especial rules to hit on waitresses? They probably have rules like “don’t flirt with clients”. And secondly, in pubs it’s not like clubs where you can approach anyone, because friends are sitting around the table. How can I approach a hot girl who is sitting in a table with a lot of people I don’t even know?? Thx man!!

First Things First

What you said about waitresses having a rule like “Don’t flirt with clients” is actually completely opposite to what their rule is. They know that men come in to drink and hopefully hook up with women, and waitresses live off the tips they get from those drunk men. So in fact they try to flirt with almost every guy in order to raise their chances of receiving a greater tip from them. Getting a waitresses number can be achieved though may be much more difficult to do so than women who are just sitting around, waiting to get picked up. Waiting on tables is their job and part of their job is to make the customers comfortable, and that includes a smile here and a flirty look or word there. And though they flirt a lot with customers, it is usually frowned upon by their managers (in most places) that they give out their numbers. I’ve been successful at hooking up with a waitress, but it actually took much longer than asking for her number at the end of your meal. I was a regular customer there, so overtime I was able to build a friendly relationship with her and one day she needed a ride home so I of course offered, and took it from there. At times, however, even if you go to a place for your first time and see a waitress you like, make sure to flirt back and take control of the situation. If another waitress or waiter approached your table but you don’t want them, be straight up with that waiter and tell them that you want “her” to wait on your table while pointing her out. Get to know her name by actually asking it rather than just reading her name-tag, and then introduce yourself, because this takes your client/waitress relationship into closer acquaintance. At the end of the meal, don’t hesitate to pay, excuse yourself from the company of people you’re with, and walk over to the waitress by yourself and just casually ask her if she’d like to get a couple of drinks someplace sometime.

Picking One Out of a Group

I agree with you 100% that it’s more difficult to hook up with a girl who is at a pub sitting at a table with a group of friends rather than picking a girl up at a club, nonetheless there are a few things you can try depending on each circumstance.

  • Blending In: Let’s say you walk into the pub and see the group already sitting at a table and you find one or two you like. If you’re with a group of friends as well, your best choice would be to blend in. What I mean by that is to try and get a table close to theirs and after some time of sitting and joking around with your friends, get into a stupid debate. So for example, disagree with your friends about which one of you could most likely pull of a big hobo-beard with most charm, and since of course you can’t come to a final agreement, politely interrupt the girls at the table and ask them their opinion. Of course it’s a funny topic to discuss and once they pick one of your friends as the one who can pull of the most charming looking hobo, act a little bit hurt, but laugh it off and begin a conversation between their and your table. Basically try to blend in, and overtime ask the one you like to go outside for a smoke or find some way to get her to get up with you. Once you’ve got her talking and laughing, you’re golden. All you need to do from then on is to talk her into giving you her number.
  • Find an Opening: This usually works when there aren’t too many girls at the table. While you’re at the bar grabbing a few drinks or at your table, make sure to keep your attention on her. If she goes out to smoke by herself, or if she goes to the bar by herself, or does anything without the company of her friends, that’s when you should make your approach. When she’s by herself, you can make a smoothly approach her and spark up a conversation. Don’t say anything like: “I’ve been noticing you the whole night and finally got a chance to talk to you.” That’s just creepy and she’ll most likely want to get back to her friends as fast as possible. Instead, make a comment about what she’s ordering at the bar, or give her a suggestion, or just make some casual remark which won’t make her think that you’ve noticed her prior to that very moment. And try to take it from there. Then ask her where she’s sitting and if she seems friendly and welcoming, go ahead and tell her that you’re about to leave (unless of course she invites you to her table) and you’d like to get together with her sometime, and get her number.
  • Bud In and Engage: This may work when there are at maximum 3 girls at the table. Sometimes the best way to do it is to just walk on over (usually after a few drinks when you’re feeling carefree) and just introduce yourself. Be a little bit of an asshole and even pull up a seat if you see they’re also into you approaching them. Sometimes one of the girls can be the bitch and completely try to send you off before you’re able to throw in a few words, but that’s why you should engage with the entire table when you’re talking to them rather than isolate the girl you want and focusing all of your attention on her. Try to liven up the table and make them feel comfortable with your humor.

Before taking any of these techniques into action, I suggest you read my post on being an Alpha male, because without comfort and confidence no man will even try to take these methods into practise. You really have to say “fuck it, what’s the worst that can happen” and just go for it. So good luck and I hope I’ve helped again with my post. Cheers and “stay thirsty my friend.” 🙂


  • Benjamin said:

    This is the first place I found advice on picking up girls at the bar rather than a club and they seem like they can all work. I like the “Blending In” method most but they all seem like they would do. I think it’s real cool that you share this knowledge with people. You make it seem effortless to pick up women.

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    Monty Reply:

    Benjamin, I actually like the finding an opening method. Get in, chat her up, and leave her wanting more. That’s when you go in for the number. These advice are always great and i’ll be sure to use try this out this week.

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  • Dean said:

    Always genuine and realistic advice.

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  • Issac said:

    this advice is great, i like the different techniques you’ve provided when hunting for women. im about to go to a pub soon and ill try to apply these ideas into action and let you know how i do.
    thx Robby G

    Reply to Comment

    Robby G Reply:

    @Issac: Always interested to hear stories. Just remember not to get shook at the last minute.

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  • Al said:

    There is no doubts that one of these methods will work, in fact, i have not only used these methods before, i was actually taught by watching the one and only Robby-G, youre great, they really do work.. For me, the opener is always my favourite, im not confident enough for the other ones lol, but great post robby, love how your going out of the confines of a club or lounge into a bar. Nice one.

    Reply to Comment

    Robby G Reply:

    @Al: My man Al, finding an opening and using it is a great method that works most of the time. About the confidence thing at a bar, don’t even worry about the girls, just feel secure in what you’re doing. Just read some of my other posts on confidence, or just drink a couple of pints before the approach. Cheers.

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  • Alec said:

    Hey Robby! Thank you a lot! This helped me finally getting the waitresses number!

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