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Three People is a Crowd

29 June 2012 No Comment

There is a lot to this but I’ll try to be brief.

I have been fucking this guy for a couple months now. The first night I went
over there, I told him I didn’t want a relationship. He keeps telling me about
his friend, a musician, that I need to meet him and we would have a good time
playing together. (I’m a musician too) Well, Friday night, a couple of my
girlfriends and I went out with my buddy and his friend. The moment I saw his
friend I didn’t want anyone else, and it was pretty obvious he felt the same
way. So all night he and I were flirting, and my buddy was flirting with my
girlfriends. We all go back to buddy’s place and continue to drink and play
guitars and stuff. One of my friends leaves and then buddy is all over my other
friend, so his friend and I go into buddy’s room and are on youtube listening to
music, chillin, looking into each others eyes and I feel a kiss coming. Right
then buddy comes in and wants to talk to me in the bathroom so I go. He wants to
have a threesome with me and my friend. I tell him that I’m actually having a
good time with his friend and why don’t they just do it. He says well ya’ll have
done it before right? And yes we have and I tell him. So he’s like come on you
know you want to, so I say maybe but I don’t want your friend to leave yet. So I
come out and sit back down with his friend, and then buddy takes his friend
outside. I hear raised voices and he comes back in, grabs his guitar and burns
out. I’m like wait! Where are you going? and buddy slams the door before I can
chase him out. I was wanting to get his number because we were wanting to hang
out again. So then buddy’s like let’s go let’s get it on and I say hold up I
like your friend and I didn’t want him to go! I didn’t get his number. And buddy
says I have his number now let’s all fuck. I say give me a minute because I
feel like I lost his friend and I really REALLY liked his friend. I tell them
I’m not into it, I just want to go to bed, but because we’re all SINGLE, they
should feel free to go do it. Then he takes me aside again and says he doesn’t
want her unless I do it too, and he really likes me and all this shit and trying
to be all up on me and I had to fend him off all night because we were too drunk
to drive home.

Now I need to know how I can get his friend’s number?? I don’t think buddy wants
me to have it. This sucks because I really like his friend and I’d rather not
talk to him anymore because he was such a dick to me and my friend but he’s the
only way I can get to his friend. I feel awful about it, but I can’t change the
way I feel.

You shouldn’t feel awful about anything. Your “buddy” was being a douchebag by cockblocking both you and his own friend and it’s right that you fended him off and held your ground. When circumstances like that arise, you have to know what it is that you want and not allow anyone else to stop you from getting it. When you told your buddy you don’t want to have a threesome, he told his friend something in secret and messed up your and his chances of hooking up. What you should do now if you want to get the guy’s number is to tell your buddy that you want to his friend again sometime and that you should all go out again sometime. And if your girlfriend liked your buddy then take her along as well so they can spend time together while you and the other guy you like can do your own thing. And if your buddy acts up and seems jealous about the whole thing, then tell him to his face that he’s acting childish and that because you’re feeling his friend that he should be happy for you two rather than try and slow down the action.

Main thing to keep in mind here is that you shouldn’t feel awkward or like you owe your buddy anything, and that if you’re interested in his friend then you should get what you want. I don’t see too big of a dilemma in this situation and it shouldn’t be too hard for you to get his number. If you want to avoid going through your buddy to getting the guy’s number then try and find other friends of his that know of the guy as well. I really do not know how close you are with your buddy and what sort of a relationship you two share, but either way I do not think you should feel obligated or awkward in any way, and should simply ask for the number.

Also, another suggestion I have is that next time your buddy acts the way he did, you don’t just brush it off as something light but tell him that what he’s doing is completely out of line and if he’s going to continue to act and talk disregard to your wants and with disrespect then you’ll treat him the exact same way. But if you do decide to say something like that then you’ll have to follow through if he does in fact continue to mistreat and disrespect you.


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