Tricking Fuck-Buddy to Becoming Your Boyfriend
I meet this bloke about 4 months ago. We have been fuckbuddies ever since.
We text each other most days and he phones me most weekends after a night
out. We both said we didn’t want a relationship as I was happy being single
and he’d just come out of a serious relationship.
The problem is I’ve started to feel more for him which I hadn’t planned to
do and a couple of weeks ago when I was drunk I told him. He was really
honest and said that he wasn’t ready for a relationship even though he knows
we get on so well and the sex is amazing.
I thought I wouldn’t hear from him again but not long after telling him
this he went away for a lads holiday and while he was away he has been
texting me (nice texts as well as dirty texts). I feel like he’s giving me
Should I walk away before I get hurt or should I continue to be his
fuckbuddy? He’s back in a few days and wants to meet up for a bit of fun
when he gets back. Any advice would be greatly appreciated as my friends are
giving me mixed advice.
I’ll say this from the start. If you like the sex and want to keep sleeping with him with no strings attached, as he wants to do, then go ahead and do that. However, since you’ve pointed out that you like him and want a relationship with him, I guarantee that it will be tormenting and unsatisfying for you in the long-run if you continue to sleep with him when you feel like you need more than that. The problem with continuing to see him in a fuck-buddy relations is that you’ll enjoy the sex, but will eventually get really fed up with the fact that he only calls you when he wants to fuck, if that hasn’t already begun. That will eventually make you feel really bad inside and he may pick up on it, but you’ll probably try to do all you can to keep satisfying him. That’s the problem with falling for a fuck-buddy.
How Can You Make Him Like You?
A fuck-buddy telling a woman that he isn’t ready for a relationship sort of means that he just doesn’t want to take things to the next level and complicate the whole thing. So how can you make him see that it would actually be beneficial to him if you guys were in an actual relationship rather than just fuck-buddies? Invite him out. Do it like this. When he gets back, call him and just talk. Don’t mention going out and when he asks to meet up for “fun”, just say you can’t that evening. Then wait a few days or maybe a couple of weeks and just keep texting him and whatever, just make sure not to meet up. Then one afternoon give him a call and ask him if he wants to meet up for coffee or lunch. Actually try to get to know him more, but more importantly, try to make him interested in you by getting him to know you better. Just don’t act needy and the best way to do that is to imagine that you haven’t slept with each other yet. Try to make yourself seem mysterious and fascinating, not for your looks or sex appeal, but for your personality, ability to be humorous, and general knowledge. Believe it or not, men want to date smart girls. Who they sleep with don’t have to be bright, but in order to date a man you should be able to talk about something that is interesting to him. Then, try the calling and going out again and again and try not to have sex with him when you guys meet up. Basically what you need to do is try and do everything a couple does without him really knowing that he’s gradually conforming to a relationship with you. It sounds sneaky and cunning, but if you want a relationship with a guy who doesn’t really feel it necessary, then go ahead and do it. Essentially, make him work for the sex. And once in a while when you feel like you two are getting close enough on an emotional level, then try and have affectionate love making with him rather than a quickie. Also, if you see he’s distancing himself from you because he may see through what you’re doing, then use sex to your advantage and give him a taste of some sexual contact, but don’t deliver completely.
Labelling it as being in a relationship isn’t essential to actually being in a relationship. So even though there is quite some game-playing you need to do to get him to fall for you, which he will eventually do because if he’s willing to sleep with you, I can almost guarantee that if you play it right then he’ll be willing to date you as well, or at least will be tricked into it. Nonetheless, if you think all of this isn’t worth it and this guy isn’t someone you want to waste energy on, then as I said in the beginning, you can continue being his fuck-buddy, or you can just forget about him completely by telling him that what he’s offering (just sex) isn’t enough to satisfy you and you don’t think you should continue doing it.